Personals Ad...2011

Old single white male, Skeletor body, bony smile, hates snowmen and Spiders, DEFINITELY. LOVES BEES, and GOLD! Super smoky appearance and behavior coupled with a laughing box that never stops, I can be alot of fun at parties, and funerals.

Enjoys working, smoking, and cake. Being only 8% gay means alot more man than you bargained for. Fashion, still NEEDS improvement. If you feel annoyed when a bum asks for a quarter, we are DEFINITELY not a match.

Comes with a First Lady....And a White House.

An avid pretender I am outgoing, faking it till I make it, but in all seriousness, I am a decent domestic person with laundry folding skills, and also can bake a cake as fast as I can.

I dont have a home I call my own, but yours will do just fine.....I often need some money, but again, yours will do just fine...A relationship is about sharing RIIIIGGGHHHTTTT?

Smug at times I will expect you listen to me at all times, even when sleeping...

I can somewhat drive a big rig, but mostly I like spending time on those that laugh at my maneuvers and the like....."Someday Delivery Service, by Karl" a new business venture I will start , you know, Someday.

I make alot of promises and fall short, but Love will bind it all together in a haze....

If you are interested in meeting me, I Definitely will probably delay it, put it off for a while, worry then get back with an excuse......

Mostly ashamed of myself, You will Definitely make me feel better about myself, thats your part....DUH.

Heres what Im looking for in a Man--

Must be masculine, must be everything I am not to be sure I know my place-Nowhere, at least in MY minds comparison. Must be strong, for I whine ALOT.

Um, must be able to morph like Gumbi to see that my mood shifts are met with the personality of the day, I wish to be around.....

If you like this ad, please respond....Im waiting! Cant wait!

My fascination with BEES, Explained........

I love BEES. Everyone knows this because I cant stop talking about them, BZZ,BZZZ, But seriously, I was thinking today whilst being a robot at work, about my fascination with these lovely beautiful winged workmen of the sky.......


When I was young, Im talking 4 to 15, I was living with parents and was often punished for behaving, well, mostly badly. Most often the punishment was going to bed, sometimes for complete weekends.

My home wasnt the sort of home you might imagine, it was more like a well created horror flick stage set, literally, old, broken, wallpaper shredding, water stained, falling apart, kinda dark. In my bedroom there was no electricity....so when the sun set, that was that. In any case in the Spring and Summer days, I can remember the biggest fear I had....It was Mud Wasps.....They would fly right in the old slat style windows, and make nests of mud in the corner of my bedroom..It was a frightening sight.....In hindsight, their size and ability to fly with a body seemingly so out of proportion, was grotesque and scary.... They looked like little evil monsters, a terribly twisted look. I would lay in bed, and just wait for one to notice me and come attack me. Or maybe in the middle of the night they would DEFINITELY get me....

The work they did was simple, they came in, built some more nest, and flew right back out the window. Nothing else.....Soon once Summer began there were more, maybe 6 or 7....coming and going as they pleased just for shelter, but in mind they were plotting to bite the Sh*t out of me, and I would finally succumb to a BEE murder.

Year after year this would happen and after a time, they were no longer threatening...They allowed for me an escape from thought of the life I was living....I wondered about THEM. I wondered how far they had to go to get the right kind of mud, did they like rich thick black soil, or just plain old sand? What did they furnish their mud house with? TV? Rotary antenna? I never did see the antenna....But I still wondered, Once the sun set, what did they do in there?

After a time,I learned the timing from when one flew out the window and when they came back, from that I could judge about how far they flew.....

They werent after me. They kept me company on some very dark days.

A few years later I was outside on a ladder watching my Father put new shingles on the house, and litte did I know, I was rattling a hornets nest under the gutter via the ladder, WELL, they came out in a flurry and got attacked, It was my fault, 12 bees, 12 stings, 12 deaths......12...HMMMM, was that an OMEN? I wonder.....

That was my first experience with the vengeance of BEES.

The second time was just as unintended as the first...cleaning the yard one day, I was moving old rotting railroad ties and other wood crap. I picked up one tie and suddenly a whole nest of Bumble Bees came falling out, I was Horrified.......I ran and ran.....They never got me, but I learned very fast. Some BEES like the hieght and safety of dry homeland, while other BEES like living in the moisture rich comfort of deterioration.

The third and final time, was when I was mowing the ground, and Hornets came right up out of the chute, all over me.......I ran and ran again(Seems where I developed the habit of running away from my problems).....Hornets are easily pissed off, while Bumble Bees not so much.

As I got older and wiser I came to understand BEES alot better and learned how to work with and around them when I encounter them.

I did a fair amount of painting and trim work for a dear friend of mine over the past few years. Trim is a pretty dry spot for any BEE......I discovered that even when you remove a cover to their entire nest, aggravation CAN be avoided if its done slowly.....they seem to Understand in some way or another how to perceive true threat.... Most hives have one or 2 guard BEES, flying around making BZZZ sounds and stuff.....And if you watch closely at a wood BEE nest long enough you will find the guard BEE will even chase a bird or Dragonfly right away, bravery at its best considering the size difference and flying abilities.


I have murdered alot of BEES, especially at night, My dear friend let me know exactly what they are doing at night-Nothing......So that's a good time to get at a small hive if you have to murder them.

There are even laws protecting larger BEE hives, Bet you didnt know that, MURDERERS.

I love BEES, I will continue to watch them, be next to them, and be nice to them.